I have a hard time rating my favorite movies, much less putting them in an orderly list where I can claim which one is, indeed, the best on my list.  So, in random order, with no particular significance, with me only stating a few paragraphs why the following are my favorites in my movie collection, here are my favorite movies:

Fellini's SATYRICON is, I believe, one of Fellini's best movies and I love it for its flamboyant stylistic take on ancient history. The story is based on Petronius's novella about life in the time of Nero and centers around the adventures of the hero Encolpio and his ex-best friend/lover Ascilto.  The story starts with Encolpio fighting with Ascilto over the ownership of a boy they both love, Gitone.  Encolpio is sore to find out that Ascilto has sold Gitone to a local playwright.  Encolpio, in the first of a series of adventures, fights to win back Gitone but soon gets rejected by Gitone.  Before Encolpio can kill himself over this, a terrible earthquake shatters the home he once shared with the two boys and he soon goes on a journey that will eventually lead him to be temporarily guided by a poor poet, only to later be given hospitality by the rich nemesis of said poet, and then off he is flung into circumstances that lead him to be sold into slavery.  While on the slave ship, he catches the eye of the captain who, after wrestling with him, decides to marry him.  Later, after the ship is wrecked, Encolpio is reunited with Ascilto and together they help a ruffian kidnap an albino hermaphrodite demi-god from the temple of Apollo.  When the god dies, Encolpio is cursed with impotence (one of the usual curses one can be inflicted with for desecrating a temple god) and must seek a cure.  Ascilto takes him to a brothel, all to no avail.  Encolpio is then told he must find an African witch with the power to make fire from between her thighs, but by the time Encolpio arrives in her homeland, she has long since died.  Only through making love with one of her priestesses does Encolpio get his "mojo" back.  This is not your typical movie and is anything but light viewing! 

Whether or not you watch it with English subtitles, the story is still the same and the dialogue flows poetically.  I first saw this film on HBO many years ago when I was only 11 years old.  I didn't really understand what was going on the film, it was late at night, and it was the very first film I saw that depicted homosexual relationships.  Most kids my age would have flipped through the channels more to discover something mundane, but the costumes -- a mix of late '60s glamour and based ancient Roman garb -- and the poetry of the dialogue really made a strong impression on me.  I especially loved the decadance and high towering headresses the women wore.  Shortly after I saw this movie, I saw Clash of the Titans in the theatre and it was seriously lacking the style and overt sexuality that Satyricon had.  This is one film I constantly fall back on when writing my own stories based on ancient myth and magic.

Dario Argento's SUSPIRIA has always been a treat for me.  Not the most cleverly written of his films, but definitely one of the most stylistic, it follows the story of a young American dancer who enters a strange German ballet academy.  When she arrives, she discovers a distraught woman leaving the building, a woman who shortly thereafter is found dead from a hideous fall.  No one knows who the murderer is, but there are surreal voices and sounds coming from the walls of the academy late at night.  As the American dancer seeks to further investigate the strange happenings, she falls unnaturally ill and is later drugged by the staff who want to stop her from discovering the truth; that the place is run by an evil matron witch over several hundred years old.

Suspiria has probably the most uncomfortable gross-out horror scene I have ever seen; the one where maggots fall from the ceiling and get into everything.  It just made my skin crawl!  This movie was also made right around the same time the original Amityville Horror was released, so the whole hooky thing with the floating cat's eyes standing in for the spectral eyes of a demon in the window became something of a cliché for a little while.  This movie is also one that is makes use of vivid color.  The special effects are a bit cheesy, but it's the music and subliminal sounds that make a viewer squirm.  Years later, I listened to interviews and commentary concerning the film and was pleased to find that the story was based on creepy folk tales that were told to Dario and his wife when they were kids.  Suspiria definitely has that feel to it, something old creeping back to life out to get you!

BARBARELLA is a classic for me, again, not cleverly written and only loosely based on the original French comic book (also one of my favorites), but it was lavishly created during a very exciting time; 1968.  I often turn back to watch this movie because of its camp and glamour, kitsch sets and psychedelic images.  Jane Fonda has never looked as good as she did in this flick, and Anita Pallenberg (supermodel of the times who once dated Keith Richards) plays the perfect purring villianess. 

And who can resist one of its original taglines:  "Who seduces an angel? Who strips in space? Who conveys love by hand? Who gives up the pill? Who takes sex to outer space? Who's the girl of the 21st century? Who nearly dies of pleasure?"

And who can deny the power of such quotes in it as: "An Angel doesn't make love, an angel is love."

While I'm speaking about Barbarella, I can't resist to mention one of my latest favorite movies that features a story based on the making of a '60s sci-fi epic by Roman Coppola; CQ.  This movie has a story and a retro-futuristic look that really seduced me.  The story is about a young American filmmaker, Paul, who comes to Paris to edit a science fiction B-movie.  He is on the outs with his girlfriend and the production of the film is also having its terrible ups and downs.  Near the end Paul is called upon to finish filming the movie on his own.  With his help, the film finally ends with more of a punch, but like the director who bailed out before him, he also falls in love with the lead actress playing super secret agent Dragonfly!  But does he really end up hooking up with the beauty who plays Dragonfly?  It's hinted at in the end when Paul releases a documentary of his life during the years 1969-70.  What I love about this film is the whole idea and look of a retro-future, mixing the best and most kitsch of the '60s with a 21st century twist.  It's also a creative look at filmmaking and the people who work behind the camera that doesn't make you want to take a nap.  There are times when you want to slap Paul for being so self-centered at times, but that's what a lot of people do when they put themselves in front of the camera while they undergo transformations off camera.

I can't leave out my favorite John Waters' film of all time, FEMALE TROUBLE!  Before I ever saw Pink Flamingos, I saw the grotesque misadventures of Dawn Davenport, a spoiled teenager who grows up to be a celebrated criminal scarred by her acid-throwing mother-in-law and seduced by a rapid adoring public who thrills to her increasingly violent exploits.  This is probably also my very first exposure to drag queens and other overly made-up creatures of the street who were later to become my heroines.  John Waters has a way of making white trash look so dangerously sweet; you wouldn't want these women as your neighbors, but they also certainly wouldn't make nice enemies!  The extreme characters in this movie are fashion terrorists.  Look at how creepily arched are Divine's eyebrows and the towering hair-dos!  Believe it or not, when I was a small child women were still wearing their hair teased up like that or they did as my mother did; they bought a wig already made in the highest style of their choice and just slipped it on when they woke up.  When my mother actually got her hair done in a style similiar to the one Divine (in the middle of the photo above) wears, she would have to wrap up her hair in paper towels and sleep sitting up so it could last longer.  So, when I watch this film, it reminds me of inner city Milwaukee in the early '70s and it makes me a little homesick in a very strange way...

Getting to subject matter that's a little more high of brow, I especially love Edouard Molinaro's Beaumarchais, the Scoundrel .  Those of you who are familiar with French cinema will recall that Molinaro was also the director of  La Cage aux Folles.  I am always delighted to view a film about 18th century France by French filmmakers because I feel that they are the people who have more to say about the history of their own country, yet just like this country, when it comes to politics, it seems everyone sides with the Revolutionaries!  Beaumarchais is one of those legendary characters like Casanova; constantly getting into brawls, love affairs, and political misadventures, yet he somehow always came out on top, hence he was called a scoundrel.  The real Pierre-Augustin Caron de Beaumarchais was the son of a watchmaker who later invented a new escapement for watches but his invention was stolen.  After writing his grievance in the Mercure, and had the matter referred to the Academy of Sciences, which decided in his favour, he attracted the attention of the court and was appointed by the King to make a special watch for Mme de Pompadour.  This was the first in a lifelong series of favors and requests bestowed upon him by the aristocracy.  After he acquired a fortune and did a lot of traveling, was influenced by folk tales and tragic stories, so he soon took up writing and music and became a great talent for not only making art, but for being something of a con-artist.  In this film, Beaumarchais is a hero who acts as both artist and the king's secret service agent, in particular his trip to England to destroy pamphlets (the 18th century's version of tabloids) attacking Prince Louis and Marie Antoinette; an adventure more amazing than the intrigues in Beaumarchais' own ficitional plays.  While on his trips to England, Beaumarchais becomes more and more interested and inspired by the revolution in America.  He decides to convince the King to support the American revolutionarie and succeeds in inducing the French government to give ample, though private, assistance in money and arms to the Americans.  Beaumarchais then writes a scandalous play mocking the aristocracy, literally biting the hands that feed him, with the production of Le Mariage de Figaro ("The Marriage of Figaro") that would much later be turned into an opera by Mozart.

While I'm on the subject of movies about 18th century France, my next favorite is RIDICULE directed by Patrice Leconte.  This film is one that realistically, without too much artistic license, displays the intrigues of the court of King Louis XVI, as well as the manners and etiquette of those times.  It's rare to get an interesting story about likable characters who exist during a time of strict rituals of etiquette conveyed so easily and enjoyably to a 21st century audience.  The story is about a poor French nobleman who must take a journey to court to petition the help of the king.  In order to even get his foot in the door, he has to undergo rigorous training in the arts of wit and ridicule to charm the snobs at Versailles.  Meanwhile, his peasants are starving and dying from a plague, and only his scientific plans for a much needed drainage project will save them.  For awhile he is seduced by the court he is trying to win favor from, and he needs to keep face as much as possible to stay in the aristos good graces, especially if he wants to succeed with his plans, but he isn't the only nobleman who competes for the King's favor.  In this court, it's not your sword that can kill, it's your word, and this Marquis has to keep it sharp.  But he is distracted by his love for an equally poor noblewoman who must marry an old weathly man in order to fund her own scientific experiments and is twarted by the lust of an older artistocratic woman close to the royal family.  Two disasterous things befall him in his quest for royal favor; he kills one of the king's personal guard in a duel and he chooses to be with the woman he loves instead of continuing to play around with the older woman.  This film is a feast for the eyes and vividly portrays the French culture of the 1780's.

For those of you who like period films, but don't like to bother with reading subtitles, VATEL is an opulent extravaganza of feasting, frivoltry, artistocracy running around being snobby, unrequited romance, forbidden love affairs, and the steamy politics of the court of King Louis XIV.  Based on a true story, Vatel (played beautifully by Gérard Depardieu) is the steward of a poor country prince who is in charge of creating three days of festivities at a chateau in Chantilly in honor of the vacationing King in 1671.  Vatel, and other workmen of low birth high in talent, struggle to make the king's stay as magnificent as possible at great risk to their own financial survival, and all of it is done to honor their master, Louis II de Bourbon, Prince de Condé.  During the struggle to maintain honor and festivities, Vatel falls in love with the king's newest mistress, Anne de Montausier (played by a ravishing Uma Thurman whose silk gowns hiss passionately with her every step).  Anne is deeply moved by Vatel's honesty and dignity, but their's is a love affair not meant to last.  Troubles for Vatel escalate when there is no fish arriving in time for Friday's banquet and, instead of facing dishonour and scandal, Vatel spirals into a deep despair from which he cannot escape...

This is a very sad movie, but the food in it makes the mouth water.  I dare anyone to watch it and not get hungry by the end!  It's truly a feast for the eyes.

If you haven't figured it out by now, I am queen of the sci-fi B-movies and, if you're a close friend, I will no doubt subject you to at least one viewing of ZARDOZ!  Come on, seriously, who can resist Sean Connery running around half-naked in the Irish countryside?  Based on the novel of the same title, ZARDOZ is well written and could easily be re-conceived for the 21st century with better special effects, but its cheesiness and sexiness is much desired and lacking in many of today's sci-fi movies.  This one is a particular cult classic and is yet another one of those "set in a post-apocalyptic future world" stories.  We children of the '70s grew up in fear of the atomic bomb and this made for a great many fictional story about the end-of-the-world scenarios, many of which are fanciful and crazy, but ultimately a stigmatised view of the times.  It's hard now to imagine a future where everyone looks like they are wearing clothes manufactured by a designer heavy into tye-dye and macrame!  But it is the story and the view of the future (besides Sean Connery's half-naked adventures) that makes this film such a gem to watch.

The story centers about a man named Zed (Sean Connery) who lives as one of the Brutals, a tribe of primitive men who serve as exterminators for the rich Eternals.  The Eternals are a highly civilized tribe of immortal people with intense mental powers who have long separated themselves from other post-apocalyptic survivors after a plague ravaged the land.  The other survivors are no longer civilized and tend to die off rather quickly by sickness or exterminated by the Brutals if they get over-populated.  The perfect society of the Eternals is in sore need of revitalization, however, as many of their race are sedated into a terrible state of apathy.  Only Zed can free them by re-introducing death to their world. 

My last favorite on this list is DEADMAN starring Johnny Depp.  This is sort of a cult western mystery, but unlike those action adventures, this one is filled with all sorts of oddities and quirky characters that I love.  Accountant William Blake's parents have both recently died, and his fiancee broke off their engagement. Blake uses his last remaining money for a train ride from Cleveland, Ohio to a town out West known as Machine, for a job offered him in a letter. After arriving at the Dickinson Metal Works, he finds the position has already been filled and he's out of luck. Later Blake meets an ex-whore named Thel and the two of them have a one-night stand that ends tragically when Thel's ex-fiancé finds the two of them in bed. Thel protects Blake from her ex-fiancé's gunfire, only to still get shot in the heart, yet he doesn't die right away from the blast. Blake then takes a gun Thel had shown him earlier to kill her ex-fiancé and escapes out the window. Blake's bad luck has it that the ex-fiancé is Dickinson's son, and he has just escaped by stealing Dickinson's prized pinto. Dickinson immediately hires a gang of three lack-luster, homicidal bounty hunters to track Blake. The next morning, after running away with that pinto, Nobody (a Native American) finds him, mistakes Blake for his namesake (the poet William Blake) attempts to heal his wound, then realizes it will eventually be fatal. Blake is, indeed, a walking dead man. With Nobody's help and spiritual guidance, Blake gets revenge and ends up killing a lot of other people in the process.  What this film vivids shows is the truly violent and surreal nature of survival in the old west.  Filmed entirely in black and white, it also gives the audience the feel that they are watching a "talkie" moving film from the old west -- while watching it I get really immersed in it.