It is definitely hot cocoa weather out here now.  First major snow storm has left me feeling very, very happy for some odd reason.  Maybe it was the prophetic dream egseah had about me dancing and giggling in the snow that inspired me to be happy.  Or maybe it's just the snow itself.  How it transforms everything into blankets of sparkling whiteness.  Or maybe it's because it's not too cold out and I can wear my big boots with the thick heel that gives me a few more inches of height.  Or it could be that, after weeks of living on a near starvation diet, I got some relief from a local organization and managed to get some real food in the house!  All I know is that I'm going to hold tightly onto these moments of happiness for as long as I can and hope they carry me through the rest of the winter.

The last few dreams I've had, I've dreamt of my former best friend's new wife, Andrea.  I have no idea what she looks like, and perhaps this is my mind or spirit's way of making peace with my lost love.  In my dreams she had long light brown hair very much like Andrew's but she wears her hair loose and feathery.  She has wide blue eyes and was dressed in black.  The two of us were walking along a snowy beach near some white cliffs.  Also near us were a family of seals.  I didn't know she was Andrea until she told me that she was upset with Drew because he never let her meet me.  I apologized to her for Drew's mistake.  "Maybe he was afraid you'd not like me or that I wouldn't like you," I told her, "Or maybe he just wanted to spare us both the drama."  Andrea then said, "Well, fuck that!"  And she pulled on my right arm, encouraging me to go to the seals.  So walked up to the seals.  The baby seals were friendly, but the parents weren't, so, to get them to trust us, we tried to act like seals.  Andrea didn't fare as well as I did with the seals.  But, then again, I wasn't all that successful at getting them to trust me either.  All I remember was turning to her and saying, "I don't think they like humans much."

Then last night I had a dream about miyamom and I going to the same white cliffs where the seals were to meet Andrea.  Miya was very nervous about going, but I told her to hold my hand and everything will be alright.  "Andrew won't be there," I told her and she seemed relieved.  We reached the base of the white cliffs and there was Andrea waiting there with a little boat.  As we got into the boat, the barking of the seals broke the silence between us and we all started to laugh.  Then it began to snow as we headed out to sea.  The three of us were very happy.  Then I looked up into the sky to see a very tall woman made out of ice.  She was melting and smiling.  When I woke up, my stomach was growling.  It pissed me off because I knew that there was more to the dream and I didn't want to wake up until I could experience more.

So, snow and seals are my major dream images this week so far.  Wonder what it all means?