I was given the most creepiest come on line EVER
The day before I moved out of my old basement apartment, the boyfriend of the drunk who lives upstairs hit on me. It happened while I was taking a break from packing and decided to take some cool night air. The guy came out of the backyard, parked his bike, and said to me, "Rick tells me you're a witch." I laughed. Like who doesn't know that about me in town? So what. Before I could say anything in return, he says, "Would you like to have a warlock tonight?" I laugh harder. Is he serious? Drunk? What an idiot.  BUT it gets worse.  I explain to him that he isn't a warlock and if he's offering me one, he's full of shit and doesn't know what he's talking about.  I tell him what a real warlock is.  He then says, "Well, some people say I'm an evil man."  I say, "That's nice" as I am about to go back inside to get away from him.  As I turn away, he rubs his hand down my side.  I slap away his hand and tell him "now that is unasked for!"  He doesn't say sorry.  Just gives me a blank look that I think he thinks makes him look sexy but just shows he's even more of an idiot, but less of a forgiveable one.  "I'm told I'm a good kisser," he adds, "and I can do you up the back side... real good."  My skin crawls.  I literally open the door and run inside.  As I leave he says, "I'll come down stairs to keep you company."  No, thank you.  I lock the door and sleep with my 911 cell phone.  The next day my landlady tells me that this guy had just gotten out of jail for being a pedophile.  Great.  Makes me even happier for moving.  My previous landlady had a tendency to take in very dangerous, crazy strays.  I'm very happy to be out of there.  I'd rather deal with my brother giving me hell than some weirdo molesting me.

Paris Hilton, despite the glamour of her fame, is really ordinary

I didn't get a chance to comment much on Paris going to jail because I figured just about all of us are tired of hearing about it.  My initial reaction was one of "who cares?" anyway.  Even though I'm not a fan, the fact that she went to jail made her seem more human to me.  When they first sent her home early, I wasn't surprised, not because she's a celebrity, but because the over crowding in jails does tend to mean that there are some who are put on house arrest.  I've known enough people in trouble like that and have had more than a few friends wear one of those ankle bracelets and their arrests were all about them having done something stupid, not violent.  When she revealed on Larry King Live that it was panic that was the main cause of her initial early release, again I wasn't surprised.  And despite the fact that everyone has made fun of her, that Larry King interview really opened my eyes, made me realize that this girl really isn't stupid, she's just really normal and the only real thing that makes her unique is her heiress/celebrity status which is totally overblown.  I can't hate a person like her.  I don't even want to make fun of her.  I predict she will go through several religions until she finally matures.  She's not going to end up an actress or even an activist like she thinks she wants, she will just become someone we once heard a lot about and may someday appear in a John Waters movie as an extra.  Why, you ask?  Well, because Paris Hilton's fame is really ridiculous and is the only thing that makes her interesting, and that makes her kitsch enough to be in something like a John Waters movie, but don't give her too many lines because if any of you have seen her film Bottoms Up, it's plain to see she's not leading role material... at all.  My other prediction for her is that she will become one of those old ladies with several cats and dogs and will end up being something of an eccentric recluse who has a bedroom used as a shrine to herself.

Medium John J. Oliver gives me horny vibes

After watching a marathon of Court TV's Haunting Evidence, I look at John J. Oliver and get the sense that he's a very sexual individual.  I don't really know why I get that impression about him.  He's the only psychic investigator I've ever met who gives me that horny vibe, like he loves sex a lot and that it's his way to really unwind.  The other psychic on the show, Carla Baron, just gives me the psychic impression that she's a motherly type, really into her home and family, and that's how she approuches each case.  John, on the other hand, is very intense with just about everything he does.  Besides being horny, he exudes determination and ambition, something I sense in a lot of high profile mediums.  However, unlike someone like John Edward, he's not a performance artist with his craft.  Maybe it's the faces he makes while in trance that gives the impression he's sexy, or the dark glasses and suits he wears giving the image of a Euro-trash kind of pretty boy.  John Oliver is not your typical medium.  After looking at his bio page, it's not surprising to me that he lives in New York City.  I am a medium myself, so sometimes when I watch these shows using famous intuitives to solve cold cases, I pick up on the other mediums themselves and laugh my ass off.  The only thing that befuddles me while watching them at work is wondering how they do it -- or, more precisely, how can they stand being on camera like that?  What they do is not easy and you gotta have some emotional strength to deal with and sort through the crappy visions to get to the meat or heart of the background of the case.  Every psychic I know is an ordinary person.  Having visions is nothing new to me and members of my family.  But what I also know about many psychics, famour or not, is that we all tend to develop disorders or we pick up weird quirks to deal with real life.  So while I watch shows like Haunting Evidence, I am laughing not because I disbelieve the visions the psychics on the show are having, I'm laughing because John J. Oliver and Carla Baron both seem so ordinary to me, like people I'd be more prone to share a coffee with than see on TV giving readings!  Plus the graphics and presentation -- the "oh, so spooky!" moody blue autumn tree shadows and fog -- they use to advertise the show is most unnecessary, yet without that bit the show would be as ordinary as its stars really are and can get boring.  The show's "dressing" is funny and more prone to attract people to the subject matter all because Ooooh, it's got psychics in it! and the commercials are so hooky, claiming "if you see this episode, you'll die of surprise" sorta thing that I can't help but laugh so hard my sides hurt. 

In any case, whether or not I'm right on about John's horny vibes, you gotta admit there's an aura of sexiness about him that you can't shake off.  Gay or straight, he's got that appeal.  And if my observations about this ever get read by John (I'm already blushing), I'm sure I'm bound to catch a little hell for it, but I can't help but point out the hotness. 

Hmmmm... I think I'm going to write more about psychics in a minute....